“Any opportunity that folks have to be heard can move us an inch closer to a different way of being. Even if it doesn't change everything, it is an opportunity worth pursuing.”
– Ciarra Grobe, West High School Restorative Justice Coordinator
Ciarra Grobe is one of four restorative justice coordinators who were hired and placed in each one of MMSD’s four high schools in the fall of 2021. Ciarra comes to the work with evident passion, a sense of calling, an extensive professional background in restorative justice and in supporting kids at risk of system involvement, as well as a master’s degree in criminal justice.
“When I first went to a [restorative justice] circle I didn’t know I was going to be a part of a circle, and I was really taken aback,” Ciarra told us. “I was really uncomfortable because it was so different from how I was used to being in the world. But then when I had the opportunity to really experience that way of being I realized this is what I want to do with the rest of my life. I was instantly sold on this idea of being in a state of constant reflection and curiosity and thinking about our interconnectedness in our relationships. It’s pivotal to everything else. That's how I got to where I am at West.”
At West, Ciarra is charged with bringing a restorative justice mindset to school climate and culture. That means introducing what restorative justice is to students, staff, and families, including the practice’s “belief that people are profoundly interconnected, and relational,” and “its roots in the traditions of Indigenous people and communities of color around the world.”
According to the district’s website, restorative justice coordinators work to build relationships and a sense of belonging, and to “infuse restorative mindsets and racially just and equitable practices into school culture and systems and elevate youth voice and leadership in restorative justice work.”
(To hear the youth explain it, watch this video from West High’s Restorative Justice Club).
We have edited this interview for clarity and concision.
FFJ: It's interesting that you brought up the awkwardness of that first moment of being in a restorative justice circle because it does seem that, for a lot of people, it's not always clear what “work” is being done in those circles. Can you talk a little bit about what you see as the long-term promise of restorative justice and what it has the capacity to change or transform in our communities? Can you take us past that initial moment of awkwardness?
So often I feel like we're taught and conditioned in our society to just go go go go, to fake it until you make it, to go on to the next thing. And circle process and just the way of being in terms of restorative justice, restorative practices, is about slowing down and really providing an opportunity for folks to see each other and let their guard down. And when folks are able to do that the learning is infinite. When you go into a circle, no matter the group of people, you’re always learning something because everyone comes in with their own experiences, the complexities of their identity. And so, for the long-term promise, in general in our culture it seems as though when folks are challenged, they feel like they need to defend themselves, we’re conditioned to get defensive. Restorative justice provides an opportunity to move past that and think, ‘Huh, I wonder why that person is feeling that way’ and it provides folks an opportunity to really see other folks and work through conflict if and when that arises.
So, yes, there is a component of restorative justice practice that is about what we do when harm happens, how do we move forward, but there’s also the more foundational piece of ‘how do we show up for one another, in community, and how do we cultivate a space that is unique to our own, whether that’s in the school community or department chairs, a core class, or the leadership team.’ So restorative justice, that way of being, it provides you with an opportunity to talk about your values, what is important to you, and to talk about the ways in which you are either living in accordance with your values or maybe you need to reevaluate what your values are. And that allows so much trust to build with folks, especially when our communities kind of feel divided. That trust and understanding, that seeking to understand, is so important, and it’s ultimately a way to unify folks and to create opportunities for more vulnerability.
FFJ: When you go out into the world and talk about what you do, what are some of the most common misconceptions you hear about restorative justice in our schools and what do you think the barriers are to making restorative justice be everything that it can be?
That’s the interesting thing. When I talk with folks, I don’t often first tell them that I’m a restorative justice practitioner just because I’m wondering, ‘are they really curious, do they really want to know?’ Oftentimes what I say is “I do culture and climate work in my school” because ultimately that is what it is, supporting people, supporting relationships, supporting community. When I tell folks I’m a restorative justice coach, I’ve heard people say, ‘so you’re like the new police?’ Or I’ve heard people say, ‘so you’re the one who fixes things,’ or, ‘oh my gosh that must be horrible, that must be so hard.’ Or I’ve had people say some really offensive stuff, especially when we think about the Indigenous roots of the practice, ‘Oh, are we just going to circle it away?’ Or ‘oh, are you just going to sing kumbaya?,’ which honestly makes me cringe.
But the biggest barrier for this work to be done to fidelity? It’s honestly the fact that it’s so counterculture to how schools function in general. I think the biggest barrier is time for folks.
Lack of time would be the biggest one. In this work I feel very privileged to have so much support from the district and within my school community, to be able to take the time to do the work, to the best that I can to fidelity, and to provide other folks the opportunity to engage. Honestly there aren’t always a ton of opportunities because of the number of constraints that are on classroom teachers and other people in the building, when we have so many students and there are so many needs. And so again, the biggest thing is the time allocated to this work. Right now there’s one of us in each of the four high schools, which is wonderful. And there is a whole lot more we could do if there were more RJ coaches in the school.
FFJ: What are your thoughts on the ways in which restorative justice needs to grow at MMSD? What would that look like?
Would I like to have more support at the high school, would it be great to have another person? Oh my gosh, yes. And honestly long-term, a dream of mine, how cool would it be to have a coordinator for each grade, to grow with that class, to be a point person for those students? But when I think of full district implementation and things that are going to shift climate and culture long-term, I’m thinking about my elementary schools, I’m thinking about my middle schools. And I’m thinking about how are we cultivating places for young children to grow, and adults in those buildings too, to model and grow with those mindsets? I think of the opportunity there would be if that was just the entire district’s way of being.
FFJ: What do you think is the best way for parents and community members to engage with or advocate for restorative justice in schools?
I work a lot with our multicultural student services coordinator on how to engage families, on how to create welcoming spaces for families to want to be engaged and, honestly, that work involves recognizing and addressing the harm and distrust that a lot of families have in regards to how their students have been treated in schools. I've definitely had situations where I've supported families and it's taken a while to build trust.
In working in schools I recognize that, as much as I don't agree with how the system was founded and some of the decisions made within schools and the whole infrastructure, I’ve joined a system that ultimately has perpetuated harm against Black and brown students, Indigenous students, and that's for me to hold and be mindful of in terms of how I'm showing up. And if folks are triggered by hearing the words restorative justice, what does that mean? I've had families think that by me calling to just to check in that their kid’s in trouble and that’s a reality. And that goes back to how the work isn't always being done fidelity throughout the United States. There is a big misconception that it’s only something you do when harm happens. It honestly gets in the way of all the opportunities there are for healing in this work. What I try and do when I talk to families is focus on that relationship piece, meet people where they’re at and again, what healing do they want and need? My job is to really listen to parents and take feedback.
I struggle in that it hurts my heart how counterculture restorative justice is and the fact that it’s going to be a long road. I'm fully invested. I've had full support from the folks supporting me at district and within the building. I’m trying to create spaces where I can do this work authentically while also acknowledging that we're kind of operating within two worlds, which is really weird and really hard. But we don’t have to stall the work or stop the work and I think there's power in acknowledging that. Any opportunity that folks have to be heard can move us an inch closer to a different way of being. Even if it doesn't change everything, it is an opportunity worth pursuing.
Watch West High Restorative Justice Club’s spotlight here:
Read more about MMSD’s restorative justice program here:
Further reading on restorative justice:
Families for Justice is a network of people working to dismantle white supremacy in Dane County and beyond through multi-generational community organizing and direct action. Learn more here.